Perez Hilton Gets a Bloody Nose

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Perez Hilton says he was punched by Peas’ manager By ROB GILLIES (Associated Press Writer) From Associated Press June 22, 2009 12:01 PM EDT TORONTO - Celebrity blogger Perez Hilton says he got a black eye from the manager of the Black Eyed Peas. Hilton says he got into argument with Fergie and will.i.am of the Black Eyed Peas at a Toronto nightclub early Monday morning and was punched outside the club by Polo Molina, the band’s manager. Toronto Police Constable Tony Vella says Molina turned himself in and has been charged with assault Hilton tweeted shortly after being punched, claiming in a 4 a.m. posting that: “I am bleeding. Please, I need to file a police report. No joke.” Hilton, whose name is real is Mario Lavandeira, said in interview with The Associated Press that he argued with will.i.am after the musician told Hilton not to write about his band on his Web site.

The Manager was out of line in telling Perez that he should not write about his band, and slugging somebody is never a good idea but still…somebody giving that annoyning little twerp a bloody nose gives me much joy.

To whom is he tweeting “Please, I need to file a police report”? That’s my favorite part.

http://twitter.com/perezhilton/

It’s so fucking funny to read. Please! Please!

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I’m in shock. I need the police ASAP. Please come to the SoHo Metropolitan Hotel now. Please. I was assaulted by Will.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas and his security guards. I am bleeding. Please, I need to file a police report. No joke. Still waiting for the police. The bleeding has stopped. I need to document this. Please, can the police come to the SoHo Met Hotel. I spoke to my lawyer. I really need to talk to the authorities. Please come to the SoHo Met Hotel. Have called the police. Need them here.

Please, someone make things better. Please, someone explain to me how the world works. Is 911 on Twitter? Please.

I have avoided this Perez Hilton fellow and now I only wish that the Black Eyed Fists guy had more hate in him.

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Originally Posted by Alex Riviello View Post http://twitter.com/perezhilton/ It’s so fucking funny to read. Please! Please!

The whole thing reads like Balkie freaking the fuck out in the elevator when Slater pulls the gun in True Romance.

“I just want someone to come take me away!”

This brightened my day.

His last name is Lavandeira? Portuguese I guess, but in Spanish just switch the ‘i’ after the ‘r’ (lavanderia) and his last name means “laundry” (or laundromat).

Ugh, he has over a million followers on Twitter. That depresses me.

I just bought one of their albums off of Itunes to celebrate this momentous achievement.

Can’t we just take everyone involved in this, sit them down together in a room, get them talking, and then set the room on fire?

Do police routinely cruise Twitter looking for emergencies? Why the fuck is he wasting time posting that shit to his account?

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Originally Posted by Chris Miller View Post Can’t we just take everyone involved in this, sit them down together in a room, get them talking, and then set the room on fire?

I’m stealing this.

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Originally Posted by The Dark Shake View Post Do police routinely cruise Twitter looking for emergencies? Why the fuck is he wasting time posting that shit to his account?

Maybe some of those “real” superheroes should patrol twitter and help morons like this guy.

Also- if you can type “I’m in shock” isn’t that a sure sign that you’re actually not?

This is almost as strange as that psuedo-celeb couple that Twittered through giving birth.

http://twitter.com/iamtherealwill

will.am.i has something to say about that supposed incident this morning.

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Originally Posted by ElaineBenesNYC I have run out of toilet paper. Someone please get me a roll from the bathroom closet. I can’t reach it from here. Please. about 6 minutes ago from web

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Originally Posted by twittygenovese I am being mugged right now. This is not a joke. Please, someone get down here and fuck this guy up for me. Please, I’m going to be late to pick up my dress about 2 minutes ago from TwitterFon

He seems genuinely surprised that forging a career based solely on treating people like dirt, and saying vile things about others behind their back (or using MS Paint), would one day lead to somebody punching him in the face.

I’m just amazed it hasn’t happened sooner, and by someone far cooler than someone from the Black Eyed Peas.

Holy shit, Twitty Genovese. I nearly threw up from guffawing so hard.

I swing for the cheap seats, Jake.

LOL he cry like girl