All of that is COMPLETELY fair and natural. In fact, I went into something very similar in the Ghostbusters 3 thread about how tricky and distressing to see a close friend get attacked. And I certainly admire that loyalty for friends in difficult times.
But my question is… would you try to defend your friend over something so serious over Twitter and end it with “just saying”???
Unrelated to the Heard/Depp story… over the past few years, “just saying!” has become associated in my mind with other passive-aggressive phrases like
“Now, I’m not racist, but…”
“No offense, but…”
“Just bein’ honest!”
and other similar flip qualifiers. It strikes a very peculiar tone that acts like a warning signal to me whenever someone is trying to post about a serious topic (usually a reactive rant).
AI don’t gravitate towards Twitter, Facebook, etc, nor am I a public figure, so no.
Now, if a friend of mine were accused of something and if it so happened that my defense of them would find its way into a public forum, I would have zero issue with that.
As far as him punctuating the tweet with “just saying”? It’s an extension of him expressing his disbelief. He might regret it, but again, no issue.
I have no problem believing Heard (and personally feel that shit did go down), so I’m not about to cast doubt on her or defend Depp, but I must admit that outside of CHUD, I have not been looking around the interwebs for discussions on this subject if for nothing more than to avoid all of the supercilious pontificating that so often comes along with unfortunate news like this.
“Oh, well, he’s such a nice guy, that doesn’t seem like him at all!” Speaking as someone who was abused over the course of a few years as a child, my abuser was one of the nicest people imaginable in public: charismatic, active in his community, part of a wide circle of friends who thought the world of him, etc. He was very careful to make sure that he felt more powerful than the people who saw his less pleasant side, and I was targeted in part because of that perceived power differential. While I can understand Bettany’s desire to defend his friend, his defense relies on a dangerous assumption about abusers, and the “just saying” at the end does feel dismissive.
If Bettany wanted to make the point that people shouldn’t rush to judgment before all of the facts are known, which is completely fair, he did it in the worst possible way.
That’s all fair. I grew up with a person who was very cruel towards me and people outside the family thought (and continue to think) the world of him. Would they defend him if I were to put his shit out in public? Maybe, maybe not, but they’re not my concern. Bettany is telling people what he knows of his friend and I feel that it should be understood that he has a perspective that the rest of us don’t, just as Heard has a perspective that he doesn’t.
A[quote name=“Bailey” url=“/community/t/155529/johnny-depp-accused-of-domestic-violence/30#post_4073581”]Paul can defend him but I’d Bettany money Depp’s guilty.[/quote]
Wonder if Johnny’s done this before, I’d like to know how Depp the rabbit hole goes.
A[quote]
Bingo and I were at Johnny’s house for most of that Saturday until just before the alleged assault. We assumed initially that his dour mood was because of his mother’s death the day before. But he opened up in the most vulnerable of ways that it was not only his mother, but that Amber was now going to leave him, threatening to lie about him publicly in any and every possible duplicitous way if he didn’t agree to her terms. Blackmail is what I would imagine other people might put it, including the manner in which he is now being vilified.
[/quote]